Its Just Not Okay

I was talking to 5 women recently and they all were reflecting on their marriages/relationships that were riddled with pain, betrayal, neglect, abuse, mistreatment and some form of abandonment.

All of their men had cheated on them, two conceiving multiple children outside of the marriage. Three had contracted a sexually transmitted disease. Every single one of them had gone through a phone or a pocket and confronted some woman about “their” man. Each had cried themselves to sleep too many nights and lied to themselves about themselves and “their” man.

Sadly, each gushed about “still being with” him. Proudly baring those battle scars as if they were receiving some kind of purple heart. The pain still in their eyes and in their words.

My heart just ached.

Yes, I have been in some not so perfect relationships and made some choices that made good sense at the time but one thing I have always done, is life on my terms.

I demand a certain treatment (because I give a certain treatment) and when it is not reciprocated; whoever stops getting whatever from me and whatever it costs, is what it costs.

I will not be disrespected, mistreated or dishonored. Any man who fails to protect me and what we share vehemently; is unworthy of my love. My embrace and my support.

Only a fool casts pearls to swine.

What I have come to know is that love does not hurt you to love you. Neither does it risk losing you. So as I fall back in freedoms arms, I scribe to my sisters….

That is not love ya’ll and the man who wants to love you, honor you, respect you and support you has been in the shadows of your life shaking his head because he was denied the opportunity to love you due to your choices suckering you.

Oh, and F.Y.I. healthy hearts are flush red. Bruised and dying ones are purple.

-Dana Lena’

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